How to Trust Your Leadership Instincts: A 3-Step Framework for Confident Decision Making

Making tough leadership decisions can feel overwhelming. You want to make the right choice, but you're not sure whether to trust your gut or seek advice from others.

If you've ever found yourself in this situation, you're not alone. Many female leaders struggle with decision-making confidence, especially when the stakes are high.

Why Decision Making Feels So Hard

As leaders, we often receive mixed messages about decision making. We're told to be collaborative and seek input, but also to be decisive and trust our instincts.

This creates confusion. Should you rely on your gut feelings or gather advice from your team and mentors?

The truth is, both approaches have value. The key is knowing when to use each one.

The Problem with Always Seeking Advice

While seeking guidance seems smart, it can sometimes create more problems:

• You might feel pressured to follow advice even when it doesn't feel right

• You could worry about damaging relationships if you don't take someone's suggestion

• You may start doubting your own instincts and judgment

• You might seek advice from people who don't have the right experience or perspective

The Problem with Always Trusting Your Gut

On the flip side, always going with your instincts isn't perfect either:

• You might miss important information or perspectives

• You could make decisions based on incomplete data

• You may not consider how your choices affect others

• You might struggle in areas where you lack experience

A Better Approach: The 3-Step Framework

Instead of choosing between your instincts and outside advice, use this framework to combine both effectively:

Step 1: Know When to Seek Guidance

Before automatically asking for advice, consider these factors:

Time Available: Do you have enough time to gather and process input from others?

Your Experience: How familiar are you with this type of decision? New leaders often benefit from guidance, while experienced leaders may trust their instincts more.

What's at Stake: The bigger the impact on your career, team, or organization, the more valuable outside perspectives become.

Evidence Available: Do you have clear data to support your initial thinking, or are you missing important information?

Step 2: Choose the Right Advisors

Not everyone's advice is equally valuable. Create your own criteria for choosing advisors:

• Relevant Experience: Have they faced similar situations successfully?

• Leadership Style: Do they model the type of leader you want to become?

• Relationship Quality: Can they give you honest feedback without damaging your relationship?

• Availability: Are they in the right headspace to give thoughtful guidance?

Step 3: Evaluate the Advice You Receive

Once you have input from others, ask yourself:

• Does this validate my thinking? If so, is that helpful or are you just getting confirmation bias?

• Does this challenge my approach? How do you feel about that challenge, and what might you be missing?

• How could this advisor be wrong? What perspective or information might they lack?

• How could I be wrong? What blind spots might I have?

• Is this someone I'd seek advice from again? Their response to your final decision will tell you a lot.

Making Decisions You're Proud Of

The goal isn't to make perfect decisions. It's to make decisions you can be proud of, regardless of how they turn out.

When you use this framework, you're taking responsibility for your choices while still being open to wisdom from others.

You're also protecting your relationships. Good advisors understand that the final decision is yours to make. If someone expects you to always follow their guidance, that tells you something important about the relationship.

Your Next Steps

Think about a decision you're facing right now. Walk through this framework:

1. Do you need to seek guidance, or do you have what you need to decide?

2. If you need input, who meets your criteria for good advisors?

3. How will you evaluate any advice you receive?

Remember, developing strong decision-making skills takes practice. Be patient with yourself as you build this confidence.

The more you use this framework, the more you'll trust your ability to make good choices. And that confidence will make you a stronger, more effective leader.